Dan "Dats Rayyycist"

So I know you are awaiting part two, but I got a lil buzz on right now and feel that I should give the proper attention to that story. I do, however, want to get something up on here so I'm going to share the story of "Dan". Dan Dats Rayyycist was not an attractive fellow (he had a hella underbite), but he imed me on my first night on the site and to be polite I didn't ignore him. I did sign off on him immediately (sounds like immedgiately) and received the following email:

Fun Person To Know

hey just wanted to let you know i had fun chatting with you for all twenty of those seconds lmao. but seriously though id like to chat with you again and find out more about you, you seem like a fun person to know. Peace
"Dan"

I responded (mistake 1) letting him know that I am a very busy lady and I was sorry for being rude. He sent an email asking when was the best time to reach me, and when I didn't reply I got this:

Good One For U?

i gotta good one for you, if your too busy with school and work for a pet does that also mean your too busy to have a boyfriend, or do you think you could try to make it work somehow?
"Dan"

To try to let him down gently (mistake #2), I told him I was probably too busy for a relationship and was just trying to meet new people. Response:

RE: Good One For U?

oh thats wassup. the only thing i can say is I sincerely hope that you'll allow me the opportunity to get to know you as a friend and if we click who knows, i may just bark and fetch your newspaper for you on occasion lmao.

At this point I should inform you that there is a handy dandy little button that I pushed. If you're out there... don't ever push this button. It looks promising, but it is in fact the red button of online dating. It says 'Say "No Thanks"' If you push this button, the other person get this:

"SO AND SO/WHAT'S HER FACE/ THE UGLY ONE" appreciates your taking the time to let her know you're interested, but doesn't think you're a good match for her. Don't be discouraged. Magic happens when you least expect it. With millions of singles on Match.com, you could be just one click away from finding someone who's right for you.

Start by checking out these other members

(Then puts 5 new pictures here)

AGAIN. I REPEAT, do NOT push this button ;-)

The next email went like this:

lmao no connection huh. wow i didnt see that coming. so im good enough to make you laugh a few times but not good enough to be a friend? i got you.

But that's not all folks. When I didn't respond to this email OR his IMs, this was the final email:

Right Or Wrong?

so what gives, we had a nice back and forth going on and out of nowhere you "no interest" me, judging by pics of you and your friends im thinking it had something to do with me being black. am i right or wrong?

I know what you're thinking. Dats Rayyyyycist!!! At this point I finally made the right decision and blocked his creepy underbiting ass. Lesson learned! Fortunately I didn't have to be funny or witty for this post, I'm pretty sure "Dan" did all the leg work on that one.

PS- His real name is Greg, if he finds this post he should know how much of a creeper he really was. "lmao".